I must admit my husband is a complete workaholic. On the contrary, the same applies to him too, because weekends are meant to enjoy and I am busy submitting my articles. So, in our case it is a two-way traffic wherein we both are passionate about our respective careers and are married to a workaholic. Many people complain about work culture and so do I but sometimes, it is the need of the hour. Me and husband too, have our share of fights in our married life and believe me our life is also not at all perfect, but with time, we have tried our best to find a way out of this chaos.
This is very important in a relationship and anger will lead you nowhere. My husband works for long hours and its worrisome sometimes. However, there’s no point in nagging because he has to complete his task and there’s no way for escapism. Yes, you must surely convey your feelings, but maintain peace while expressing, so that it creates a positive energy. Don’t be demanding because by pressurizing someone, you won’t be getting any output other than disappointment.
Counsel Each Other
This has worked wonders for me because my husband is a great listener. He has also given me advice that has worked wonders in my career. Several times, I have lost motivation and my husband has been my pillar. He doesn’t know my nature of work nor do I know his, but we interact and reach to a conclusion wherein we feel motivated again!
Try And Understand Each Other’s Nature Of Work
I remember an accident that is etched in my heart forever. It was my brother’s bachelor party and my husband tripped and fractured his leg. During the same time, I had an ongoing event with abundant responsibilities and so couldn’t leave my team members. Eventually, my parents and my brother took care of the scenario, got his leg plastered and dropped him home. Not once, my husband complained about my absence. Furthermore, we had just one vehicle to commute to our respective offices. My husband’s office was on the way, so I would drop as well as pick him up. There are times, he waited for 2-3 hours in the office when all his colleagues were already at home. However, he never questioned or called me repeatedly to come soon! I always asked him why he never complained and he continues to give me the same answer, “that’s your nature of work and I can’t interfere in your schedule”. On the other hand, I have also managed our family gatherings when my husband was missing from the scene owing to his work commitments.
This is very important in every relationship especially when you are married to a workaholic. When we are working on holidays, it becomes next to impossible to spend time with each other. So, in situation like these, we try and give space to each other and plan our own schedule. So, when I am working, my husband is with his friends and the same agenda applies for me! Also, we try and avoid unnecessary calls and chit-chat sessions during working hours. After all, every person craves for his/her ME-TIME, isn’t it?
Spend Quality Time Whenever Possible
It rarely happens that we are busy on weekends. But when we are at leisure, we make sure to spend quality time with each other. We also make it a point to share our valuable time with our parents by planning small outdoor trips or organize lunch/dinner. While doing all this, we make sure to keep our cell phones, laptops away to avoid any kind of disturbance!
Prioritize Your Duties
Being in IT, my husband has to waive a lot of responsibilities which eventually have to be balanced by me. Yes, it becomes stressful, but as I said in point, no. 3 – try and understand each other’s nature of work! Nevertheless, amidst his busy schedule, my husband has taken a days-off just to undertake his incomplete errands. Also, I work from home, doesn’t mean I give away all my professional work. So, we both have made equal adjustments and prioritized our duties on both – professional as well as personal level.
While undertaking all this, we make sure to respect each other and our work. Getting married to a workaholic is not a crime, but keeping your problems at bay with your sanity and conscious is equally important!